Sora gives us another week of magic and wonder, starting with Seth Rollins’ inept summoning skills, and sorting out whether Triple H really exists or not!
Welcome to SmackDown Live! It’s the final show before SummerSlam this Sunday, and so naturally we open with a contract signing for Randy Orton. He reminds us that it only takes one RKO to beat anyone before dramatically signing the contract, when Heath Slater wanders in with a fruit basket that he clearly stole from someone. No, really – the label says “To Bob, my condolences”. Slater talks some more about being the hottest free agent while Randy Orton eyes off an apple like an asshole.
We open on Randy Orton being interviewed about his upcoming matches; he’s facing Alberto del Rio tonight, so naturally we’re talking about his match with Brock Lesnar. Del Rio wanders in to indicate that he is still relevant, mocking the RKO and threatening to break Randy’s arm.
We cut straight from this into the opening sequence, and I promise this is the last time I complain about the new theme song.
We open with Randy Orton, Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon watching Randy Orton hit an RKO on Brock Lesnar all the way from the SmackDown Live roster on last night’s RAW. Shane is telling Orton that Lesnar is going to come after him, and that jeopardizes a lot of things beyond just Orton himself. He does acknowledge that it was pretty awesome, though, so that’s a good start. There are a lot of security guards standing by, though, because Orton can’t just keep RKOing Lesnar to save everyone.
The Miz and Maryse wander on in, and Miz demands to know why no one came out to hoist him up like they did to Dean. Bryan says he didn’t even want Miz on the show, just the championship, and tonight they’re going to determine the number one contender for his title. Dean wanders through as well, mostly just to say hi, I think.
Welcome to SmackDown live!
We open on Daniel Bryan and Shane McMahon, who immediately tell us that it’s all about the Superstars. That’s great guys, so… why are you here? Of course I don’t mind because it’s Daniel Bryan, everyone’s doing yes chants and standing up cheering for him when we cut to the opening titles. It’s new theme music, and I’m faintly disappointed even though I knew it was coming, because I legitimately really loved the previous theme music.
Well, I’m joining you late, starting myself off with a triple threat video package, because I was busy getting sugary drinks and setting up the fan. It’s warm in England tonight, and I’ve finally got the preshow up and going! Aaaaand Jerry Lawler is apparently still here – the roster split looks like he’s lost his spot on main commentary thanks to what Vince probably calls ‘a little indiscretion’, but he’s still going to be here for the pay-per-views. Either that, or everyone’s too embarrassed to tell him he’s fired, so they let him sit at the table and feel important, and then later on, they’ll take him out back and put him out of his misery.
Hey, wrestling fans it’s that time again! Another month, another pay per view. This one should be interesting, as the brand split has now officially happened, so it will be the last time before next month’s PPV that we will see a lot of these guys in the ring together. But enough about that, and onto my predictions for how this show will go.