Sunday recap time, guys! I won’t cover Extreme Rules, we all know about that by now, so without further ado, into the week’s results! We’ve got Money in the Bank qualifying matches to get to!
We open with a recap of the Money in the Bank qualifying matches from early this week on RAW – Cesaro, Sami Zayn, Dean Ambrose, Kevin Owens and Chris Jericho are the five confirmed men in the ladder match for the contract. There are still two unknown spots left to fill, with no signs of who they might go to.
Michael Cole is in the ring, for some reason, explaining to us the concept of Money in the Bank before revealing that he is going to be interviewing one of the money who has already qualified – Dean Ambrose. It could not be more apparent that he is also dripping water from his extremely wet hair, and while I know his shirt is probably worth a lot less than Seth Rollins’s suit, it does occur to me that I’ve never noticed just how much hair water flies around until recently. As Dean explains how he gets in the ring and does his thing, and doing his thing means people get hurt, Kevin Owens makes an appearance to say what we’ve all been thinking…
Well, I’m joining us a little late to the kickoff show, and it’s Tom Philips back in the social media lounge, talking about talking to Rusev and Lana tonight. He looks a little less like a small boy who’s made a studio in his bedroom. Apparently it’s cool to have Dean’s girlfriend talk about what a lunatic he is. And I’m joined by a small black cat and my very, very unimpressed wife, who thinks Dean Ambrose looks like mashed potato, and thinks Mitch is a stupid name for a plant. She doesn’t know the struggles we’ve seen. Her only comment on ‘it’s the gift of Jericho, drink it in’ is ‘gaaaaaaay’. That’s the woman I love.
Well, we open Raw with a recap of the AJ/Roman feud, with lots of slow-motion footage, and Roman looking bored next to the title, and I still think Roman should have eaten the pin from AJ to end that match, but ah well. Apparently creative think Roman’s at his most attractive to us when he’s just smacking the hell out of people for barely discussed reasons. I’m not entirely sure they’re wrong, honestly.
It’s here! The Grandaddy of them all, not that Vince likes us saying that! I’m very, very happy to be here for your pre-show, at least, because I’ve been in hospital for the last three days! I’m still in the hospital, doped up and full of meds, but I’m so glad to be here and sharing this with you all, I really am.