Welcome to this week’s SmackDown Live! We open this week with Shane McMahon and Daniel Bryan rewatching the end of the battle royal, still unable to determine who the proper winner was. They’re going ahead with the match between AJ Styles and Luke Harper tonight, which AJ is not thrilled with, complaining that Harper smells like a toenail and looks like the clump of hair you pull out of a shower drain. Of course, Harper is standing right behind him and the two have a staredown before we cut to the opening theme.
So, Charlotte is our new WWE Women’s Champion. That’s a statement I should be incredibly happy to write, because holy shit, it’s a WOMEN’S TITLE BELT. Not a fucking pink butterfly, not a ‘diva’ everyone is a superstar now, and that is so, so wonderful to hear. The belt itself looks amazing, like the men’s title but red where the heavyweight title is black, and with a white belt – it’s slightly more delicate, but not in a patronising way.