Well, it’s been a LONG weekend for some of us here at Rasslin Rehash, but we’re finally going to get to the superstar shake-up! Some of this is going to be honest, some of it is going to be sarcastic, and some of it is going to be downright irreverent. Enjoy!
Moving to Raw:
Dean Ambrose – the Shield boys are back together again! I was hoping the brand split would mean that Dean would start to be taken seriously as his own guy, especially as he went with the title, but it just didn’t seem to happen. Sure, the IC title will be coming with him, and I’ve always loved him with the white leather belt, but I’m almost a little disappointed that we’re going back to a Shield brand, because I think it’s a little early to be doing this. Still, we’ll see where it goes, I suppose!
The Miz & Maryse – these two have been BRILLIANT on SmackDown, as much as I wasn’t so sure about the storyline and where it was going, so I’m looking forward to seeing what these two can do for Raw! Raw has comedy, but it tends to feel stilted and awkward, so I’m very happy to see two wonderful character actors coming to give us a breath of fresh air.
Alexa Bliss – ooh, I’m excited by this one! I love Alexa, and as Jess covers SmackDown, I haven’t had much of a chance to see her in action, but I’m going to enjoy seeing how she interacts with the other women on Raw and how that dynamic woks.
Bray Wyatt – oooooh, Bray and Strowman on the same roster? It’s been weird seeing how the Harper stuff has played out, and I enjoy watching Bray, so I think I’m going to sit back and see how this works out for him.
Mickie James – YAY! I get to see her being wonderful in flares and be excited and and and…. Yeah. I’m happy about this one.
Kalisto – if he’s joining the cruiserweight roster, which would make sense, I’d be really excited to see him fit into that dynamic, and it would be really cool. Also, I’ve missed him. A lot.
Apollo Crews – I want Raw to use him better than SmackDown have, but… I’m just not sure they’re capable of that, if you look at how they’ve worked with other guys in similar manners. I’m worried.
Heath Slater & Rhyno – I’m actually excited to see some more fresh blood in the Raw tag team picture, because I had felt that with The New Day taking a back seat, the only guys I really enjoyed have been Sheamus and Cesaro, so… yeah, I’m cool with this. I look forward to it.
Curt Hawkins – is going to get lost in the crowd if Raw don’t make an effort
Elias Samson – as I don’t recap SD, and don’t watch it because I have to sleep at some point in my life, and I think I’d honestly forgotten he existed. Sorry! Maybe h’ll blow me away now he’s on Raw.
Moving to SmackDown:
Kevin Owens – FUCK YOU and the fucking horse you rode in on, you absolute wankstain, don’t you FUCKING take my Kevin.
Sami Zayn – oh, well, okay. You can have Kevin then, because Sami needs a friend on the roster, and with Dean going to Raw, and Finn staying, he can’t be left on his own. Alright, I’m fine with Kevin going, as long as he and Sami stay together.
Charlotte Flair – I can’t WAIT to see Charlotte and Becky reunited, this might honestly make me have to start watching SmackDown and say fuck my bedtimes. This is going to be INCREDIBLE.
Rusev & Lana – I figured that when Miz & Maryse went, it was going to be a couple’s swap over. I’ll miss them, certainly, but I think we got a fair trade here.
Tamina Snuka – I’m just so happy to see Tamina coming back, honestly, and while she’s split from fellow Team BAD members, I think that could be a very strong choice for it. It also puts her as the female powerhouse, the opposite to Raw’s Nia Jax, which seems to be an intelligent decision.
The Shining Stars – I think I’d honestly forgotten we had them, so I can pretty much cope with them going to SD, where the tag team picture seems a little more forefront.
Sin Cara – the fact that my Lucha babies are continually split up makes me either sad or think that they had a huge fight I missed and now they don’t speak. *sniffles* Poor flippy angels.
The New Day – this is the one where I screamed that I hated Jess and I wasn’t going to watch Raw anymore because they’d stolen my babies. BUT, Jess talked me down, because SD needed another face team, and, well… fair enough. I guess.
Jinder Mahal – I have no strong feelings about this either way.
The ONE decision where I’m absolutely livid? Swapping Byron Saxton for David Otunga. Just… please, no. Sure, we still get Corey Graves, the shining light in the dark, endless tunnel that is commentary, but oh my fucking gods I don’t want to listen to Otunga for three fucking hours. I just don’t.
I guess we’ll just have to wait and see how things pan out!