raw · Rehash

Rehash: Raw 3rd October – Los Angeles, California

Short recap today, because I’m horribly ill and can barely breathe, so we’re lucky we’ve got anything at all! Three hours from 1am to 4am is a hard time to recap when you’re not feeling 100%, but I’ve done my best with this shorter option. No matter how guilty I felt about missing a women’s main event.

Women’s Wrestling

Bayley had a chat to Sasha before the women’s MAIN EVENT SPOT!!!!! and said that she wanted it to be her out there, but she was really proud of Charlotte and Sasha, comparing them to Trish and Lita. Sasha promised to make history by taking Charlotte’s title, and Bayley wished her luck. Just before the match started, Dana and Charlotte came across Bayley and Charlotte told her that one day she’d grow up and main event too. Dana tried to pat Bayley on the head, and Bayley grabbed her the threw her into some equipment cases.

In a fucking gorgeous match, where Charlotte did a bloody amazing corkscrew moonsault to the outside, Sasha Banks became a two time Raw Women’s Champion! In a women’s main event! It’s just, y’know, a shame that they had to have no other women’s matches on the whole card in order to have them as the main event. Perhaps I ask too much. Sasha won via submission, Charlotte tapping out to the Bank Statement, so I imagine she’ll be lording that over Charlotte for a while to come. And of course, she cried after, because Sasha’s emotions over titles are well know and well loved.

Universal Title

Seth Rollins had an interview with Michael Cole where he said he’d been advised to rest, but had showed up at the arena anyway. A sad indictment of WWE’s medical team, frankly. He said that Kevin never beat him, because he was handed the victory, and while he understands the parallels people are drawing between him and Kevin, he had to cash in his briefcase and get the title for himself, rather than having it literally handed to him. He said that he was going to stop the Kevin Owens show, though he knows how the game is played, and that everyine is against him now. He also admitted that he didn’t have any friends. Poor Seth.

KO and Jericho came out to the ring and said that if Seth was smart, he’d be following doctor’s orders and resting, but because he’s a stupid idiot, he’s already asking for his rematch. Owens said that Seth hadn’t done anything to earn his rematch yet, and then addressed why Jericho was with him. Jericho said it was because they’re best friends, but KO said no, he invited Jericho because Seth blamed the ref last match. For their rematch, they need a ref who can handle anything – Jericho. Jericho said he thought they should be challenging for the tag team title instead, which Kevin eventually agreed to. 

Later, Seth and Steph had a chat, where she agreed that he was all alone and had no friends. She called him replaceable and said that he’d learn what it was like to be alone. He said that if he didnt get his rematch, he’d take her down to hell with Jericho and Owens. 

United States Championship

Roman ambled out to talk about his bloodline never having held the US title before, then Lana stalked down to the ring to tell him that he knew nothing about family, and that he had no respect for anyone else. Roman didn’t like Rusev not coming to talk to him himself, and said as much, but Lana said that Rusev had no idea she had come to talk to him – but she wanted to make a rematch between them, for the sake of her family. She also tells him to go to hell.

Rusev came out after Roman disrespected his wife a bit more, and they had a brawl on the ramp. Rusev kicked Roman over the barricade and lifted the US title as if he’d won it back. Roman staggered upright and said that if he’s going to hell, they’re coming with him – so at Hell in a Cell, it’ll be Rusev vs. Roman for the US title, in the cell. Might be interesting.

Tag Teams

Following on from KO and Jericho in the ring, The New Day came down and said they didn’t deserve a match, and although they eventually gave in, that wasn’t until Jericho had put them all on his List of Jericho for being annoying. The New Day said they’d give KO and Jericho time to get into their wrestling gear. Later, JeriKO had a chat with Ashton Kutcher and Danny Masterton – I only know who one of those people is – where Jericho said that is Kutcher and Masterton were so close they were like brothers, then he and KO were more like conjoined twins. Okay. JeriKO fought The New Day and lost. Owens cleared the ring swiftly, with his title, leaving Jericho alone, to get Pedigreed by Rollins.

Sheamus and Cesaro were bickering over being late and getting in the way of each other. Thye fought some local talent and wom, via a brogue kick from Sheamus.

The Golden Truth fought The Club for no adequately explained reason, and The Club won with a Magic Killer on R-Truth.

Cruiserweight Division

Brian Kendrick and TJ Perkins shared a reluctant handshake on TJP’s part, before getting into their match. The rivalry between these two is getting pretty delicious, and in the end, Kendrick won this match with a Captain’s Hook, TJP tapping out. But it wasn’t a title match, so the purple belt stays where it is.

Tony Nese and Rich Swann had a match, which echoes an Evolve 36 match they had this year, where they had a 10-min iron man match! Nese won with a Michinoku Driver.

Strowman & Friends

Another squash for Strowman. I sleep now. There was an interview afterwards where Strowman muttered about how he needs better competition.

Sami Zayn fought Titus O’Neil for no adequate reason, and won with a Helluva Kick.

Enzo and Cass got to do the Susan G Komen stuff and hand out pink versions of the women’s championship belt to three women who won a competition and are survivors of breast cancer.