mark my words

Mark My Words: Unwanted Encore

So, we’re getting Brock Lesnar vs. Randy Orton for a second time, only this time they’re going to do it at a house show. Maybe that will convince Brock to remember where he is, and not to use banned UFC moves against hapless wrestlers, who prefer a choreographed fight to getting their skulls opened up on the canvas with zero warning. There’s a few questions about this, even though the biggest is ‘why is this happening?’, but for a start, why is Brock even here? How did he somehow fail UFC wellness tests, but pass WWE ones, or did they just not bother testing him? Don’t WWE care about how this looks to the fans, and how it makes them look as a company? Why is Paul Heyman just the mouthpiece holding together the tattered pieces of Brock Lesnar’s professional dignity?

Within kayfabe, why is this even happening? Does it make any sense for Brock and Randy to have another match. Sure, live non-televised events often don’t play that much into kayfabe, but it’s worth thinking about. It was Paul Heyman who wanted this match to be a thing – why? Does he want to prove that his client isn’t a dangerous, unhinged animal, and can play by the rules? Does he want Brock to make another hole in Randy’s skill, so he has to have an umbrella to keep out the water when it rains? Why does he want this to happen? And why would Brock want it to happen? Well, I guess inside and outside of kayfabe, Brock Lesnar only wrestles because he gets to beat the hell out of other human beings, and he gets paid for it, so he’s in it for the joy of causing another living, breathing creature pain, and making bank.

But why would Randy agree to it? In fact, that’s a question I’ve got in and out of kayfabe – what the HELL is Randy expecting to get out of this? I guess it could be said that he’s got professional pride, so he’s going to face whoever they give to him, but inside storyline and in real life, what sort of employer could force their talent back in the ring with someone who opened him up as surely as if he’d used a can opener? 

For the squeamish, look away now.
For the squeamish, look away now.

Outside of kayfabe, I’d be assuming that Randy is booked to win, but that Brock wouldn’t agree to lose to him in a televised event, so this is the best Randy can hope for, that he’ll uphold his professional pride by winning, Brock will presumably be paid less for the appearance, because it isn’t televised, and that he’ll learn a valuable lesson from this, while WWE can still make money out of it. You might think that’s cynical, but then, I’m pretty sure Vince’s second middle name is ‘mercenary’ – he’s not about to stop a measly thing like ten stitches stop him from making money. Not when they’re not in his head, anyway.

It seems like a weird choice to book a match fpr a second time when we didn’t want to see the first one, but no one’s ever said that WWE booking made sense, even with Vince Russo long gone. All we can hope is that Randy gets his win, Brock doesn’t get paid a ridiculous amount for being there, and that if anyone’s walking away with a hole in their skull, it’s the man who kept the championship off TV for months, who walks back into WWE expecting top billing no matter what he does, and who has said, repeatedly, that he’s only in wrestling for the money.